E is for: Entangled Souls

This post is part of a series I’m so excited about: “The ABC’s of What I’ve Learned as a Medium and Intuitive Healer.” This is my full-time career, and I am thrilled for the opportunity to share what I’ve learned!

Entangled Souls

In the nonphysical, we have an “inner circle:” a group of souls whom we love dearly and incarnate with frequently because we’re likely to get a lot done or learn lessons very well together. An inner circle is made of 20-30 souls, all of similar soul age (though at different stages of development), and each inner circle will share several guides who know the souls well and are very active in their development, in spirit and during each lifetime. 

Each time a soul plans to incarnate again, it’s a big coordination effort between themselves and typically 3-8 entangled souls from their inner circle who will incarnate with them as romantic interests, friends, family, mentors, and more, depending on the needs of everyone involved and their respective life purposes! 

Sacred Contracts

In every case of entanglement, the two souls carry a sacred or soul contract. A contract is an agreement which two souls make for how they would like to behave together during a lifetime. These relationships are those in which we believe we can teach each other something or offer some sense of purpose to the other's life, and our contracts reflect that.

These agreements are not always fulfilled. In fact, more often, they're not! I've seen many not meet their soul connections (much less the contracts) due to not moving or making a life change, among many other reasons. (For instance, one's romantic connection or mentor may be waiting at a new job where they have been given the intuitive nudge to apply many times, but always talked themselves out of it.) 

This is a good way to distinguish between fate and destiny, as Spirit does: Destiny is unchangeable. We’re fated to meet our entanglements, but not destined. We can trick, abuse, abandon, and otherwise avoid fate. Very little is destined: impossible to change or shift. We change our fate all the time! We even surprise our spirit guides all the time (usually by finding a billion ways to avoid our fate).

Sometimes, our romantic entanglement ends up being someone we simply don't like or aren’t attracted to as humans, and we’re unable to live out our contract for that reason. Some contracts have built-in termination, when two are meant to teach each other something and then move on (often, we don’t listen then, either!). 

These agreements can be made more complicated by situations like giving up a baby for adoption though a contract specified the opposite. I’ve even seen cases where one soul in an entanglement decided not to incarnate, leaving the contract forever impossible to fulfill. This is leaving out everyday reasons! We forget our soul entanglements, purpose, past lives, and so much more upon birth, but our souls are still inside us, feeling it. Our soul feels all karma and baggage associated with this person, whether we know why or not.

 There are many ways we do not end up listening to our inner voice, and these are often the reasons these contracts don’t work out. Our intentions once we’re born are often very different than our higher self’s intentions, as we don’t have all the same information. Our soul contracts still give us an excellent idea of why someone is in our life, as we know what our soul and their soul intended to achieve with the relationship this lifetime. When they do work out, we are truly in alignment with our guides and higher selves!

(For anyone interested in sacred contracts, I heavily recommend the book Sacred Contracts by Caroline Myss! She combines her research into soul contracts with her research into archetypal lessons, and it’s fascinating and wonderful!)

Types of Entanglements/Contracts

I’m of the opinion that most readers and healers access these things differently, and they look how we’ll be able to make sense of them. If the way I lay this out isn’t the same as how you experience it, I’d love to hear about it! 

The way I look for soul entanglements is by looking for which kinds they are, and for me, they come down to one of the following kinds of connections/contracts: parent/child, mentor/student, romantic connections (of which there are two kinds), friends, other familial connections (like siblings, grandparents, etc.), person/pet, or parental figure/child figure. We will get more into the types of contracts which generally accompany these entanglements!

These entanglements aren’t based on who we like best or enjoy most, it’s really a fringe benefit when that’s the case! Our entanglements are based on whom we best learn from and with, whom we can grow alongside, and who can aid us in achieving our life purpose, along with us aiding them in achieving theirs! Entangled souls are a group who all want the absolute best for each other, and everyone is invested in seeing the others succeed.

Only one of these never changes relationships - in most cases, you and the other souls will change out relationships regularly for whatever is most suitable for the relationships and karma involved. For instance, a brother this lifetime may be a friend in another, a mentor one lifetime may be a romantic connection in another, etc.

Romantic Connections

I’ll start with romantic connections because they make me the most nervous! Also, every single person I’ve ever read for has had at least one romantic entanglement, so it’s relevant! Most people would call these two “romantic soulmates” and “twin flames,” but there is a significant amount of misinformation floating around about soulmates and twin flames. I see more misconceptions here than on almost any other topics! So I will share my experience, as at least per the Record, these are two different types of contracts. 

Our “romantic soulmate” is someone whom we’re meant to meet every lifetime once we entangle, though some do not meet theirs for reasons like those outlined (not starting a new job, not moving to a new city, one soul deciding not to incarnate, etc.).  When these relationships are healthy, they’re amazing! They can be catalysts for immense growth, can bring about huge achievement, and can be beautiful sources of love and devotion. These are the only entanglements we have where the relationship never changes: even if the relationship isn’t meant to work out, our soulmate will not suddenly show up as our father, mentor, or sister. This relationship and cord are similar every lifetime.

These are also the only contracts in which we tend to grow or stagnate together. We’ll talk more about soul age later, but generally, we want this relationship to be between two souls who age at roughly the same rate. If one soul ages out of their current inner circle, but their soulmate does not, they will have to wait in the circle they’ve outgrown, though they’re ready for new lessons. Again, more on this later.

Sometimes these relationships do not work out. Sometimes it’s even in the contract that it should not work out, because one’s growth is better served outside of the relationship, one is paying off a large karmic debt, etc. While we can tell Spirit is in all ways supportive of LGBTQ+ relationships because one’s romantic soulmate is usually what they’re attracted to (a gay man will have a male soulmate, a lesbian will have a female soulmate - this alone to me shows that it’s silly to say God is against LGBT relationships), I’ve also seen, in lifetimes in which it was meant not to work out, one’s soulmate born to a gender which they’re not attracted to. Or the two will be very different ages or born in very distant countries, and be unable to meet or be together physically (though I’ve personally seen cases like this meet online hundreds of times, including in refugee situations).

When the relationship is meant to work out, soulmate contracts often involve supporting one another; being the best the two parties can be together and separately; if there’s karmic debt involved, it almost always includes that. Terms often involve helping each other through hard times and making one another feel seen, valued, and validated. Terms often make up for past-life mistakes, so they’ll involve stability, resources, and general demeanor. In relationships where fidelity or honesty have been past-life problems, there is almost always significant karma to work through, and there will be a term associated with that. When these are not meant to work out, the terms will usually include hoping for friendship, but that the two will ultimately go separate ways.

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A “twin flame” is, first and foremost, meant to be an inspiration. They’re often a romantic connection, though also regularly, there is not technically a romantic connection and it is more of a crush on one or each side. I also see cases where there is no crush, but something more like friendship, and the two inspire each other deeply. A twin flame is meant to teach us a lesson - usually one about love and romance, and almost always in a way which inspires us. 

In most lifetimes in which we have these connections, we meet them before we meet our soulmate, and they inspire us toward or teach us a lesson about love or connection which would prepare us for our soulmate. I come across *many* cases where one has more of a connection to their twin flame than to their romantic soulmate, and many situations in which the twin flame is even the healthier of the two romantic choices. We have free will, these decisions are always ours.

I hate the words “twin flame” because of all the ways they’re misused in the community, and I usually refer to these as “romantic inspiration” or “inspiration” contracts, depending on what is actually in a given contract. I see one person with two of these contracts relatively often, and I believe only twice, I’ve seen one person hold three romantic inspiration contracts. (Along with their romantic soulmate. We can know romantic lessons are incredibly important in a lifetime like that, with four romantic connections, and the relationships are likely to be or have been difficult.)

Romantic inspiration contracts often include helping someone understand what they’re really attracted to or what excites them in others. They regularly have to do with being the first person outside one’s family to make someone really feel seen or validated. There’s usually a lot to do with uplifting one another and with wanting each other to succeed! There are regularly terms hoping for friendship if/when the relationship ends or if it isn’t romantic.

Parents

No matter one’s soul age, parent contracts are some of the most important ones we have! I would probably argue they’re the very most important ones we have, if we look at all things considered. One is regularly entangled with at least one parent, though I also regularly see people entangled with each of their parents. It really depends on soul age, as well as one’s life path! Some old souls are meant to be born to parents or a whole family of young souls (our entanglements have to be our age, so this means there can’t be an entanglement)- I occasionally see old souls born to two young souls, in which case, their entanglements are usually with mentors, friends, and romantic connections. And vice versa - sometimes a younger soul in a family of very old souls feels like an outcast, also. When someone has no familial connections in their entanglements, it’s part of their life path. Feeling like an outcast in their family is, without a doubt, part of their plan. 

Otherwise, familial entanglements, often especially with our parents, are most likely and very important. Our parents are meant to teach us fundamental lessons. They are meant to make us feel safe from the first day they bring or have us home; we are meant to know our cries as an infant are heard and supported, and that we are not a burden to the people who love us. They are our first relationship with the world, they teach us how to view society. These contracts often have to do with things like that. 

This is also why I remind any clients I have approaching parenthood that this is the most important thing they have going on! Ensuring a child’s safety, as well as room for emotional and mental development - absolutely nothing could be more important. What happens to a child in the first years of their life cannot be undone. Unfortunately, most traumatized adults are more likely to continue a cycle of trauma and abuse with their own children than work through what was done to them. Saying, “I’m fine,” about trauma if it isn’t true means it will be our child’s problem to deal with, in every case.

So, parent contracts are often meant to teach young people very specific lessons. The parent side of the contract will usually involve support and guidance, especially through hardships which have been faced by the specific soul in the past. For instance, if one has had trouble reaching their ambitions, they’re likely to have a parent contract, and it’s likely to be built-in that a parent teach them to go after what they want from a young age - meaning they need their parent to be a soul who has a lot of willpower, determination, and a sense of achievement themselves. This is how these relationships are determined! And this is why they change so regularly. Someone who could be a great mother to you this lifetime may be an excellent father to you in another, or a sibling or mentor! We’re more likely to learn some things from some souls than others, even if every soul has a lot to teach us in their own right.

Contracts with our mothers often surround emotional intelligence, being brought up to understand our inner voice and intuition, being brought up to love ourselves and know we have an innate worth. 

When a soul has a big purpose and is meant to affect society, their parents really need to be supportive of that and teach them that it’s possible from a young age. Our parents teach us how to view society, so if we are meant to help society, but we are disgusted by it because we were born to the wrong parents, so much can go wrong! I probably see more pain from misused parent contracts than any other. 

Parental Figures

Occasionally, I will see parental figure contracts - these usually happen when a child is adopted and was meant to be, or when a family friend or someone around the child a lot almost behaves as a parental figure rather than or more than the child’s parents. In some cases, this is meant to be! Sometimes, souls learned better from someone tangential to their life, much better than they do from their actual parents! It really depends on the soul in question.

Siblings

We also regularly have contracts with our siblings. Especially if our relationship with our parents is difficult (and there’s likely to be karma involved with all these relationships, especially after a certain soul age - more on this later). Our siblings act as a buffer between us in the world in so many ways, which means we are meant to do this for them as well!

Sibling contracts usually have terms for each party; each is meant to help the other with the same thing or incredibly different things. I see contracts which are geared toward inspiring one another, really helping one another learn everything they can, helping each other communicate better, helping each other be kinder, helping each other be more efficient. There is truly no end to the way this can go! Sibling contracts are usually meant to help each make their way through the world.

Other Familial Connections

And then I have a group which, to me, shows up as “other familial connections.” These are often cousins, grandparents, and family members of all kinds who are not parents and siblings.

These contracts are honestly rare, I don’t see them come up very often at all! Again sometimes, someone’s life path really involves not being close to the people closest to them from youth, and that’s when I’ll generally see things like this. As well as in cases when a grandparent raises a child from very young, and was always meant to.

Friendship

Friendship contracts are amazing, and one is very likely to have them regardless of soul age! One is very common, I see two occasionally, but it’s rare to have more friendship connections than that. These are meant to be very close friendships, we feel a history with them just like we would feel it with a romantic partner.

These are usually meant to teach us something, inspire us, help us achieve our dreams, make us feel good about ourselves, make us feel loved and encouraged. Our friendships really support us and our feelings about ourselves very differently than any other relationship in our life, and we’re meant to do the same for our friends. Friendship contracts are amazing when they work out for exactly this reason!

Mentor & Student

Mentor and student contracts are some of my favorites! The terms of the contract are generally for the mentor to teach the student one or two specific things. In some cases, a mentor contract will have three or four items, in which case the student is meant to help the mentor with something as well! These are rare, but not altogether uncommon.

I often find those who hold mentor contracts to be actual or aspiring therapists, teachers, spiritualists, even traditional authority figures like police officers. Those who have mentor contracts are typically the souls who find themselves drawn toward mentoring others in a more general sense. I regularly find that these contracts belong to teachers we had when we were kids or in college, or they’re therapists or spiritualists meant to teach us something very specific in adulthood.

When we are the mentor, we can know it’s our responsibility to a student to teach them something very specific, and knowing about these contracts can be so beautiful!

Person & Pet

Very occasionally, I will see what is technically an entanglement with a person and a pet! This is the only case I’ve seen yet where an entanglement can happen with souls of two different ages, who are not in the same inner circle. 

We take on pet lifetimes very early, though occasionally, we will go back for a pet lifetime later, as a little bit older of a soul. Sometimes a soul needs to learn a quick lesson, and doing so as a pet is relatively easy and definitely faster than going through 60 to 100 years as a human! So sometimes, I will see a person who has had the same soul incarnate in their pets several times. I think I could count on one hand the number of times I’ve had these contracts come up in readings!

Souls as Level 1-6

*For anyone interested in learning more about this, I truly can't recommend the book Journey of Souls by Dr. Michael Newton highly enough. It is case studies completed by a PhD hypnotherapist, showing what we go through when we pass away, what we do in between lives, how we integrate lives, and why and how we choose our next one with our entanglements! I have read it many times and re-reference it often.

I have been reading the Akashic Record for past lives, entangled souls, soul contracts, and much more for years! I can say truthfully, reading Journey of Souls, it is to date the only book I’ve read in which every word rings true to what I’ve experienced in every reading and healing session I’ve ever been part of.*

In Journey of Souls, Dr. Newton wants to discuss soul age, so without intending any kind of hierarchy, he places souls in age groups of 1-6, as souls tend to age in stages and colors. When one reaches a new color, they will need to work their way out of their current inner circle, and work with new souls most appropriate for their available growth.

Per Dr. Newton’s experience with past-life regression therapy, as well as my experience with readings, most souls tend to stop incarnating for the most part around level 4, at which point their growth is best-served by guiding younger, still-incarnating souls. They’re likely to still incarnate sometimes, as level 5 souls will *very occasionally.* I promise this is all relevant! 

In my experience, souls reach level 4 at around their 120th-150th lifetime, then take on lifetimes less and less, eventually incarnating not at all. We really incarnate to learn fundamental lessons, and once we’ve learned those reliably, we’re more likely to work in spirit, guiding others. 

Clients have become angry when I’ve given them past lives readings which suggest they’ve lived 80-120 lifetimes (though this would make them an older soul for being incarnated), and I’ve had some come back to tell me no, actually, they’ve lived 600 lives. This is totally fine, I respect everyone’s journey and what different clients believe! I will absolutely never fight or disrespect a client who disagrees with a reading. But my experience suggests we don’t need anywhere near that many lifetimes to reach the ability to guide others, at which point that’s what we do. These lifetimes work out to thousands of years incarnated, as well as thousands of years of existence beyond incarnation, as we take time in between lifetimes to really integrate what went well and what went poorly from our last life before we even think to plan a new one, which again is a huge coordination effort from a number of souls.

There also aren’t hard and fast rules, of course! Joan of Arc is an ascended master, a human who reached deity status, and I work with her very closely as a spirit guide of mine and in spirit guide readings for others. She tells me she had only lived 43 lifetimes when she reached enlightenment - she was a level 2 soul when she had the lifetime in which she saw so clearly that we are all one, and that’s worth fighting for. She was a young soul who became an ascended master, proving we all age and grow at different rates! There is no shame in being younger (and really, being older often means more pain, baggage, trauma, karma, etc.), and there’s nothing to be gained from convincing anyone we’ve lived a billion lifetimes. We simply don’t need many.

So! All that to say, soul age really has quite a bit to do with what I find with one’s entangled souls! Generally speaking, I could tell you the rough soul age of someone without checking, based on the number and type of soul entanglements they have. 

What I Find With Different Soul Ages

Level 1-2

Souls who have lived under *around* 80 lifetimes (levels 1-2) usually have between 3-5 soul entanglements. I do read and heal for them regularly, but they’re slightly less likely to be interested in spiritual discovery, and when they do make their way to readings, it’s generally to discuss more physical matters. (This is NOT a criticism! There’s usually less energetic or past-life trauma to heal in the first place.)

My research, as well as Dr. Newton’s, would suggest Earth has, in the past, been mostly for level 1-2 souls to come learn fundamental lessons.

-They’re more likely to have only one romantic entanglement (more romantic lessons than this would be too complicated)

-They’re less likely to have a student contract, but may have a mentor (meaning they’re the student half)

-They’re likely to be entangled with parents, siblings, and friends - these are generally from whom they’ll learn best!

-Contracts of all kinds are likely to have fewer terms and be more simple: aiding each other in patience, kindness, fidelity, trust, vulnerability, self-esteem

Level 3

Level 3 souls, those who have generally lived around 80-120ish lifetimes, are most likely to find their way to readings! They’re likely to be interested in spiritual discovery. Over thousands of readings and healing sessions, the vast majority of my clients have been level 3 souls. There are fewer on Earth than levels 1-2, but more have been born within the last few generations, and more are being born in younger generations all the time! They usually have 4-6 soul entanglements.

-They’re more likely to be learning more intense romantic lessons, as well as playing out old karma, so I find 2-3 romantic connections is more common

-They’re more likely to be the mentor in a mentor/student relationship, but I regularly see them on either side of a mentorship contract!

-Friendship entanglements are usually less about fundamental lessons, and more about supporting one another through life and true encouragement - friendships often function like mentorships at this soul age

-Parenthood contracts are very important, and generally longer and more complicated (the contract will have more terms) - a soul this age is meant to teach their children important lessons (and a lot goes wrong when it doesn’t happen)

-Contracts of all kinds are likely to have more terms and be more complex: aiding each other in similar pursuits, but with more karma and energetic trauma to work through along the way

Level 4

Level 4 souls are often interested in spiritual discovery as well, but there are *significantly* fewer of them incarnated here, and while I work with some, they’re often best at learning what to do and then going off on their own. They’re often incredibly emotionally mature and intelligent. (Not that young/er souls can’t be!) They generally have between 5-8 entanglements.

-Their contracts are actually often less “intense” than for level 3 souls, as by this point, they’ve worked through a lot of more human issues, and often have less karma to deal with

-Romantic connections can really go either way - but I regularly see a higher number of romantic entanglements, giving one a high number of options (2-4)

-Friendships are usually very deep and connected - jealousy is usually not a factor in souls this age so they are capable of more connected friendships and can encourage one another to be their best

-They’re unlikely to be a student, but regularly have one or more mentor contracts

-Parent contracts here often function a lot like friendship! Parents are meant to encourage, support, and uplift the child, but the child will usually be emotionally mature from a young age and need relatively little “parenting” in some regards

-Contracts of all kinds can run the gamut here! I have less data to work with, as I work with them less often, but from what I do see regularly, the contracts can be long or short, and the terms can be all over the place

I also have a post about subtle energy bonds, the energetic cords we share with our entangled souls.

Through my Etsy store, I offer a reading for sacred contracts with your entangled souls.

Thanks for reading! I would love to hear about your experiences with entangled souls and soul contracts!